Thursday, 22 August 2013
The Learning Experience
Upon receiving the admission letter from
university, I frantically jumped for joy. I could not contain my excitement. It
was definitely one of the best news that I have ever received. However, that news lasted only for a short while. I
had the worse first week of school where I had learnt that it was not just
about getting into your dream course, but also to sustain yourself and getting
the best out of the four years ahead. Sadly, no one warned me about it. No
mercy was given to the high amount of workload and overnighting in studio. This
is what I called, ‘Architorture’. Despite all the hairsplitting assignments, I had grown to appreciate the nature of my course and fellow coursemates. Luckily for me, the
culture shock was toned down by friends that shared the same resentment. We
overcame it together and motivated each other. I must say that the friendship and
trust that my cohort has established would probably be the strongest as compared
to other courses due to the long overnights in our studio. ‘Architorture’
definitely pushes one to be resilient towards hardship, and prepares myself for
future challenges. Moreover, since architecture keeps on evolving, I guess my
learning journey will never stop even until my graduation.
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ya i can feel you:)
ReplyDeletei am just suggesting this:
.....had the worse first week....
In my opinion, paragraphing it might be better and clearer for the reader. For example, the change between the second and third sentence is quite abrupt. By paragraphing it, it will be easier to know that it is another stage of the story.
ReplyDeletePerhaps you can write "Despite ALL THE COMPLAINTS, I had GROWN to appreciate the nature of my course and FELLOW SCHOOLMATES." instead of "Despite those that I had mentioned, I had slowly grown to appreciate the nature of my course and its people"
ReplyDeleteInstead of 'the coming four years', perhaps you can say 'the four years ahead'.
ReplyDelete'Luckily for me'... Instead of 'lucky for me'
Instead of 'pushed one another', perhaps you can say 'supported one another', 'motivated one another' or 'pulled each other up'.
:)
Good suggestions.
DeleteSyahidah,
ReplyDeleteYour reflection is easy to follow as it flows logically from the beginning to the end. You also articulately expressed your feelings and change in feelings towards life at university. Indeed, university is about working hard, self-discipline and time management. It is so good that you learned so much about life at university so quickly. Work hard consistently throughout your studies and I am sure you will love it. You will love learning about yourself, people, and a great deal of knowledge. Most importantly, you will meet many life-long friends.
Language: Your reflection reads well. Only a few minor errors:
1. Think about the usage of ‘had’ vs ‘have’:
It was definitely one of the best news that I had ever received.
2. See comments in this sentence:
I must say that the friendship and trust that a (JUST ANY COHORT?) cohort had (HAD/HAS) established would probably be the strongest as compared to other courses due to the extensive overnights in our studio.
Note: Look up the meaning of ‘extensive’ to find out why this may not be the most appropriate vocabulary.
3. Can you see why ‘complains’ is used incorrectly?
This is what I called, ‘Architorture’. Despite all the complains, I had grown to appreciate the nature of my course and fellow coursemates.